Dating & Marriage

How to be better husband and wife

Divorce rates may be increasing, but the good news is that there are many easy ways to get a marriage back on track if the husband and wife are committed to making things work. Below is a list of ideas that Muslims can try to prevent themselves from getting into trouble.

1. Firstly, both the man and woman should be equals in their relationship; there shouldn’t be a dictator in the relationship. Men are raised to treat their wives well, with respect and to show love. Even Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) said “The best of you are they who behave best to their wives”.

2. Always remember to make decisions together. Couples that collaborate to make important decisions have better partnerships than those who make decisions alone. Both husband and wife should feel like they are important in the decision-making process.

3. Never be abusive emotionally, mentally or physically towards your partner. Any form of abuse is not acceptable under Islam.

4. Choose your words carefully. Always think before you speak, this is particularly the case when you are in the middle of a heated argument. We often say things that we don’t mean, but such conversations can have big consequences. When you are angry, try to calm down before resuming the conversation.

5. When you are in a relationship, it is important to be friends too. Show your partner that you are interested in their daily life and what they are doing. Speak to them about how their friendships are, how work is going etc. If possible, it’s a great idea to spend time working together on a project that you both enjoy. Relationships shouldn’t always just be about the bills, house, and children.

6. Put your hand up if you make a mistake. Everyone is allowed to make mistakes; the crucial thing is that we admit to and learn from them. Equally, forgive people for their mistakes. Don’t hold a grudge or seek revenge.

7. Another great piece of advice is to enjoy a meal together. Gather together as a family as much as possible. Sit around the table and talk about how your day has been. Even better, prepare meals together. It will make the meal time feel special, and you will appreciate each other.

8. One of the golden rules to a happy marriage is communication. A lack of communication is often the reason for many marital breakdowns. Both parties in the relationship should speak to each other openly. This applies to situations where things are going right or wrong. Don’t keep quiet and let things build up; this is often when problems escalate and become harder to fix.

9. Enjoy the simple things in life. Don’t constantly compare your relationship to others. Enjoy the small things together; relationships don’t have to be full of expensive things and luxuries. Be grateful for what you have.

10. Lastly, your physical relationship is important. You have to make time for intimacy. Be open about what you want and respect each other’s boundaries at all times.

If you follow the advice above, the chance of you heading for a divorce will be slimmer, and your relationship will be happy and long lasting.